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Monday, June 30, 2008

Manifesting Our Inner Potential

MANIFESTING OUR
INNER POTENTIAL

Self Limiting Elephants

Elephants born in captivity are restrained by a chain that attaches one leg to a metal spike driven into the ground. This prevents them from roaming. They become accustomed to the fact that, as long as the chain and spike are next to them, they are unable to move.

As they grow older, their minds become programmed. When they see the spike and chain, they "believe" and accept that they will not be able to move. They become so conditioned that when their owners place a small rope and wooden peg next to them, they make no effort to step away from it, because they "believe" they are unable to.
In truth, their actual power as adults is so great that they could easily pull up a chain and spike of any size. Their programming or "belief," however, allows this tiny rope and wooden peg to limit their movement.

We are all very much like these elephants. We allow the weaknesses, fears and rejection we experienced as children to program us into a life in which we lack power, peace, love and happiness. We become controlled by false childhood assumptions we have made about our ability, strength and self worth.

We can move away from these "pegs" of self-limitation, but we must chose to do so.

The Lion Cub

The story about the lion cub more graphically describes this process.
Once there was a great lioness that went hunting with her newborn cub. While chasing and attacking a flock of sheep, the she-lion made a wrong move, fell off a cliff and died.

The cub was left without a mother and grew up in the midst of the sheep. As the years passed, the cub became a full-grown lion, but it was instinctually conditioned to behave as a sheep. It ate grass, made a bleating sound, and just like the sheep, developed a fear of all other animals.

One day, another lion attacked the flock, and in the chase, was shocked to see the ridiculous sight of a full grown lion running away with the sheep bleating "bah bah" in fear.

He caught up to the sheepish lion, and asked, "What are you doing? Why are you acting in this ridiculous way? You a great, powerful lion acting like a lowly powerless sheep? What has come over you? You should be ashamed of yourself."
The sheepish lion explained that he was a sheep, and that the flock had taught him to fear and bleat and run in horror from the powerful lions.
The adult lion took the sheepish lion down to the river and asked him to look at the reflection of his own face. He saw that he was like the lion and not like the sheep. The lion then woke up from its ignorance and discovered its previously ignored inner courage, strength and majesty.

We are like the sheepish lion. The sheep represent our human nature, our personality, which moans, fears, complains and worries. The Lion is the spiritual aspect of our being, which is a source of great power, wisdom, creativity, goodness and love.
Great spiritual teachers have appeared throughout history with the same message of our "LION NATURE", the untapped spiritual power and greatness that dwells within us.

Our Life Purpose

Our life purpose is to manifest our unlimited inner power, beauty, creativity and love. We will never feel totally satisfied until we fulfill this inner need to become who we really are. Just as every flower feels a basic need to bring forth its flowers and fruits, we too have an abundance of gifts to bring forth to the world around us. We can do this in many ways.

What are your challenges, which you would like to meet today with greater confidence in your inner power and ability to cope?

1. Dealing more positively with a relationship problem?
2. Healing yourself from an illness or weakness in the body?
3. Dealing with the loss of or separation from a loved one?
4. Solving an economic problem?
5. Bringing up children with love and wisdom?
6. Manifesting social changes?
7. Facing death with inner peace when the time comes?
8. Forgiving someone?
9. Confronting fears?
10. Transforming our belief system.
11. Coping with a law case or some injustice?
12. Creating something that requires all your inner resources?
13. Finishing school?
14. Making a new step in life?
15. Making an important decision?

Whatever our present challenges might be, we need to move forward and meet them on all levels with self-confidence, self-esteem, humility, love and clarity. In addition, we need to be detached from the final outcome. It is the motive and effort which count and not the result.

We will also need to develop patience and perseverance.
We must preserver while also being patient for the results.

Finding Our Life Purpose

Finding Our Life Purpose

BASIC FOR OUR HAPPINESS

Each of us has incarnated to play a specific. When we find our special role and play it with love, we experience contentment and happiness. When we lose contact with our life purpose, or do not have the courage to live it, we experience discontent and sometimes depression.

WE MAY NEED TO MAKE CHOICES

In some cases, we may need to make choices between the following:

  • Money or meaningfulness
  • Comfort or creativity
  • Security or evolution
  • Social "success" or social responsibility
  • Superficial happiness or real inner contentment
  • Satisfying othersÕ expectations or our own inner voice or wisdom.


    Let us examine what we can do to regain contact with our life purpose.

1. Freedom From Social Programming

We need to free ourselves from our social conditioning concerning what kind of work has value. We need to be free to select the type of work and life style which suits us regardless of what others think of our choices. If our loved ones have a problem with our choices, we need to have enough inner confidence to lovingly help them understand that we are simply asking for the freedom to pursue that which fulfills us.
Often the simplest roles can offer us the greatest spiritual lessons and self-satisfaction. Take, for example, the roles of motherhood or fatherhood. Not much importance is given to them today because many feel that working in an office has more prestige or creativity. Yet, there is no more important and demanding role than that of parenthood.

2. Overcoming Fear

We will need to overcome any fears that might obstruct our ability to give ourselves wholeheartedly to our goals. Such as fear of
a. Failure
b. What others think.
c. That we may not make it financially
d. That we may not be perfect in what we do
e. That we might make a mistake.

We are all in a process of evolution. Making mistakes is natural when we are learning and creating. It is important to understand that we are worthy and lovable even though we are not perfect and even when we not have perfect results.

3. Success Is Not Required

It is imperative that we free ourselves from excessive concentration on success as a measure of our self-worth. If our motives are as pure as possible and our efforts our best for our present stage of evolution then the results do not matter. Christ, Socrates, Gandhi and Martin Luther King all lived their life purpose but were all killed by the societies in which they lived.

4. Contact With Our Inner Voice

We will need to develop a deeper contact with our inner voice through prayer, silence, and meditation. Then we will hear the "small voice" of inner wisdom and know, within ourselves, the role that we have come to play.

5. Tuning Up Our Instrument

Even if we know our role, we may not be able to play it effectively if we are frequently ill, tired, nervous, fearful or upset. A healthy body and clear mind can be maintained through healthy natural foods, exercises, breathing techniques, deep relaxation and positive thinking. With daily practice of these techniques, our bodies and minds will be capable of expressing our inner beauty and creativity.

6. Surrender To The Divine

An instrument must surrender completely to its player. Finding our role in life means being open to whatever role is useful to the universe at each place and time. We need to let go of egocentric needs and realize that at times we will be called upon to do "great works", and at others, we will be assigned simple task.

7. Pray For Guidance

We can pray for purification and guidance as instruments of divine harmony here on earth. Through prayer and sincerity, we can become transformers of spiritual energy into beneficial works here on the material level. Through our daily meditations, we can receive spiritual energy, which we can then share with those around us in the form of love, compassion, understanding and service.

8. Belief In Ourselves And Following Our Satisfaction

We need to believe in our inner feelings and what brings us happiness. Happiness and inner contentment are signs that we are aligned with our life purpose.

9. Using Our Talents

We need to get in touch with and develop our inherent talents.
They will guide us to what we have come to do.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

When I Love You Purely

When I Love You Purely

I wish for you to be always happy and healthy.


I respond to your soul needs but not always to your ego desires.
I joyfully offer my time, money and energy in support of your flowering soul.
I am happy about your successes, even when that means less attention and affirmation for me. I accept you exactly as you are.

When I love you purely, you are for me like a flower, a unique expression of divine energy.
I see your inner beauty even when you yourself cannot express it.

When I love you purely, I communicate with you honestly, expressing to you my true needs, feelings and thoughts.
It is impossible for you to hurt me, because true love expects nothing and keeps no accounts.
I allow you to find your happiness with whomever and however you are guided from within.

When I love you purely, I see you not as my possession and ask not that you love only me. That would be to limit your soul and obstruct your growth universal love.

When I love you purely, I experience your true Divine Self; as true love is divine and perceives only the divine.

I can never fear for you even when you are passing through difficulties because I remember that you always have exactly the tests, which facilitate the manifestation of your inner magnificent and the power to deal with them.

When I love you purely, I leave you in the proper moments to find your own solutions and answers, even though I feel affirmed when I find them for you.
Out of love I allow you to discover the truth which is hidden within you.
However, in order to love you purely, I need to become stronger and cease needing you to feel secure or worthy.
I will need to transcend loneliness and be with you because l love you and not because I need you.
It is not possible to love purely that which I need.

Actually only from a position of inner strength, self sufficiency and fulfillment can I love you purely
An even when you leave your physical body, my sorrow will not be from my love but from my need for your physical presence.
You are a divine being, which will have been freed from its material vehicle.

My tears will be for me.
But for you I will be happy.

Go forward my love,
You belong not to me
but to the Universe.

For that is what you truly are...
The Universe.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Loving the Wave or the Ocean

When we limit our love to a specific person (we do not mean sexually, but rather emotionally, mentally and spiritually), it is difficult to experience love in its highest expression. We love this person and not others. We tend to focus on a specific person, "loving" them often because they offer us security, pleasure or affirmation; or because we consider them to be "ours."

Pure love is universal. It can express itself toward any particular being, but it cannot limit itself to that being or group of beings. If it does, then it is love mixed with conditions. Each individual is one of the countless waves on an ocean of consciousness. The ocean is the One Universal Consciousness, which is temporarily taking the form of those specific waves and then disappearing into the formlessness of the ocean again before reappearing as billions of others. All waves are expressions of the one ocean.

When we single out one specific wave from the ocean of beings and limit our love to that, we are, in essence, loving an illusion. That being which we love is just a temporary manifestation of the one Universal Being, which manifests as all the other beings simultaneously.

That form on which we focus is a temporary physical, emotional, mental manifestation that will dissolve back into the ocean. When we love the water in that wave, that is, its spiritual essence, the spirit within, we begin to love all waves. The same water is in all the waves. The same spiritual essence is in all beings.

Then we love the spiritual essence in others and not only their form or the specific benefits that we receive from them. We love the spirit within.

Our love now becomes both unconditional and universal. It is unconditional because it does not depend on what others do or do not do, and universal because we start to love more and more people independent of their appearance, character and other superficial factors. We love the spirit within them. We as spirit are one with the spirit, which is within them.

So we can love the wave or we can love the ocean and thus all the waves. This is our choice.

Love is like the gold ore that is brought up from the earth; it is mixed with other metals (emotions, needs). Our job is to purify that gold through our efforts to love unconditionally in all of our relationships, no matter what the other does or does not do.

Only then will we truly be happy.
Only then will experience our true Self.

Spiritual Universal Love

Spiritual Universal Love


A later stage in our spiritual maturation process is the development of spiritual universal love where wisdom or spiritual discrimination is now added to our love. We now perceive all forms as various manifestations of one unchanging, ever blissful, divine consciousness.

In this state we experience pure love in which we cannot distinguish between the other and ourselves. Christ referred to this state saying, "I am in you and you are in me."

Although, as in the previous stage, we continue to help and serve wherever we can, we are not so affected by the pain and suffering we encounter. We realize that the real spiritual consciousness expressing itself through that form has chosen to pass through that experience because it is exactly the next stimulus, which he or she needs for his or her spiritual growth process. We are now aware that we are all passing through the precise experiences, pleasant and unpleasant, which we need in order to wake up from our dream of this illusory material reality.

Although we are not affected by the suffering we see, we are even more wholly dedicated toward eliminating it. Thus, we love and accept all beings as they are while we direct our energies toward facilitating this process of our mutual spiritual unfoldment. Each of us moves forward in his or her own unique way.

Previously we may have tried to solve peopleÕs problems for them. Now we realize that the most effective way we can others is to love and accept them as they are and empower them to find their own inner wisdom and strength in order to overcome their problems.

We now realize that the main solution for the worldÕs economic, political and social problems is education.

We experience such "wise love" or "loving wisdom" from the highest spiritual teachers. It is sometimes difficult to understand their love and caring, which at times to the beginner, may seem like indifference, especially when we pass through tests and expect sympathy and emotional reactions.

It is difficult for some to realize that it is sometimes more loving to allow someone to suffer a little more so he or she can find the solution him or herself and grow stronger and freer from ignorance. Only a realized being can know, however, when "not to help" externally because this would be the most loving act for a specific person.

Many parents would do well to learn this form of wise love. They might help their children far more if they refrain from solving their problems every time they are in trouble.

No one should, however, misconceive that this text is suggesting that we should not help those who are in need. We must help, but we must also ask ourselves what the most appropriate help would be in each situation.

The greatest and most precious help we can offer to those we love, is to help them get in touch with their inner power and wisdom. This, at times, means helping, and at others, means letting them struggle by themselves while we mentally pray for them and visualize them in light.

For an awakened spiritual being to see someone cry about some unhappy event in his or her life or fear some future possibility, might be like our watching a small child cry about a toy that has broken or express fear of the "boogie man." We sympathize with and understand the childÕs feelings. We love it and we want to help it, but we cannot really be worried.

Those who experience this level of love sometimes do not exhibit the emotional display which others may be used to interpreting as indications of love. As we grow spiritually, we begin to understand, however, that real love is a love for the soul within the other, which is seeking to free itself from ignorance and the illusion of weakness and fear.

These spiritually awakened beings offer help on other levels through their positive thought forms, prayers or sometimes, direct contact on the astral level, usually in dreams.

In this way, help is given without undermining the othersÕ self-confidence.



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Monday, June 16, 2008

Selfless Love

Selfless Love


Selfless Love for a Specific Person


An essential stage in the evolution of love is being able to love others regardless of their behavior. Probably the closest most of us have come to experiencing such love is towards our children.

There are some parents who have totally selfless love for their children. They maintain steady love for "their child" even if he or she does not live up to the parentsÕ expectations, even if he or she rejects and abuses the parents, and even if he or she becomes a dangerous criminal.

This love is not universal nor is it totally unconditional because there is one condition, that the other is "my child" and not someone elseÕs.

We might also experience this type of selfless love for a specific person when he or she is "our student" or under "our care or responsibility." This type of love often has to do with the role of protector or feeling responsibility for someone. It enables us to accept all types of behavior from others and continue accepting and loving them with understanding and compassion.

In some cases, we may also feel such love for persons who belong to the same grouping, i.e. nationality, religion or social class.

In these cases, we do not gain something tangible from these individuals. We do not require anything from them. Our love is not dependent upon their abiding by a certain type of behavior or even reciprocating our love. Our love is more selfless but still specific and not universal.

Universal Selfless Love


The next stage is to expand our feelings of unconditional love and acceptance to a wider circle of people and eventually to all beings - including animals, plants and insects. This love, however, is still directed toward form.

We are focused on the temporary form being occupied by these beings; thus we feel a sense of sadness when they experience suffering or unhappiness, or if and when we loose them.

We perceive their form as reality. We feel love and acceptance for that person, but we still live within the illusion that the form is the reality. We forget that behind that form there is an immortal ever-blissful consciousness, which is just temporarily projecting that form toward the earth plane level. Universal consciousness is never in pain, never suffers, is never unhappy and can never die. That consciousness is the ultimate reality of the being or beings whom we love.

Those who experience this universal selfless love often choose careers or lifestyles that allow them to serve the whole in some way. They may join service groups such as the Peace Corps or other voluntary service organizations. They feel a need to express that love through actions which better the quality of life for those around them, especially for those who are suffering, lonely or unhappy.

Their interest expands beyond the limits of themselves and their immediate family. They begin to realize that all beings are brothers and sisters in one spiritual family of all humanity. As their awareness grows, they perceive even animals, plants and insects as belonging to "their family."

They seek to express this love through acts of service and care.


Friday, June 13, 2008

Understanding the Sexes

Understanding the Sexes

Although each gender tends to express itself quite differently, most philosophical teachings agree that the soul is neither male nor female. As souls, we incarnate into a gender in order to learn through that experience. Through our experimentation with the various qualities of each sex we are seeking to experience our true whole self.

Until we do experience our inner fullness, we seek to find completion externally through a love partner.

This effort towards attunement with the other sex brings stability, joy, security and affirmation but is not without problems and challenges. One main challenge is being able to understand, respond to and find solutions for the need differences when they occur. Some of these main conflicts are differing needs for:

a. Cleanliness - order
b. Affection, sex
c. How to use money
d. How to bring up children
e. Social activity

Most of these conflicts actually have to do with:

1. Freedom vs. control = power
2. Who is right = self-worth

COMMUNICATION DIFFERENCES

In addition to these differing needs, men and women have different ways of and motives for communicating. Both, of course, use communication as a means to express needs, prove they are right and affirm their self-worth.

Studies have shown, however, that women use communication in order to create an emotional connection or bond. Thus the communication itself is the purpose.

Men seem to perceive communication as a means towards some result such as solving a problem.

Thus, we often have the situation in which a woman will start a conversation about a subject, not because she wants a solution but because she experiences a connection through the communication itself. The man however, feels that communication has only one purpose, to arrive at a conclusion or solution and then there is no more need to communicate. Thus the universal problem that women feel men are aloof and men that women are interrogators.

MEN DO NOT FEEL COMFORTABLE TALKING ABOUT EMOTIONS

If they are talking about the womanOs emotions, then they are likely to feel that they are to blame and are being criticized since the woman is not happy. If a woman expresses an emotion, she usually wants recognition of that fact that she feels that way. The man usually does not realize this and seeks in the least possible words to convince her that there is no reason for her to feel this way. He seeks a solution. She then looses her vehicle of connecting.

If she wants to talk about his emotions, it is even worse. First of all he seldom knows what his emotions are. He has been trained a whole lifetime to suppress, hide or shut off what he is feeling. Secondly, even if he has some awareness of what he feels, he feels totally demeaned if he has to admit that he feels self-doubt or fear. Men in general do not like to admit their fears or weaknesses.

All of the above are of course generalizations, and there will be exceptions.

We have here a serious problem in communication in which each sex will need to understand the other.

WE NEED TO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER

Women need to understand that when men are aloof or do not communicate their feelings and thoughts, it is often simply because they function differently and not because they do not love their love partner. They experience unity, not so much through words but rather through action, such as working to make money and take care of the family.

Men on the other hand need to understand that women need to generate feelings of unity and love through verbal communication. Men need to acknowledge womenOs feelings rather than find reasons why they shouldnOt have them.



Love, Pleasure or Affirmation ?

Love, Pleasure or Affirmation ?

Needing Others for Pleasure

Let us examine how our needs for pleasure and affirmation can limit and distort our experience of love.

We create relationships that give us pleasure and affirmation as well as security. We may be dependent upon the other for money, shelter, sex, travel, clothing, encouragement, compliments, humor, tasty food, a clean house, comforts, or even his or her beauty.

Yet, if he or she stops providing these for us, or decides to provide them for someone else, do we continue loving that person or do we feel hurt, disillusioned, and overcome with feelings of injustice, anger and perhaps revenge?

The condition here is that "I love as long as you provide me pleasure, happiness or excitement. If you stop, my feelings change." It is conditional love.

Needing Others for Affirmation


We may also depend on someone for affirmation. This may take various forms.

  1. We are affirmed when others obey us. "You listen to me and do what I say. I can control you. That makes me feel powerful and worthy. If, however, you stop doing whatever I say, I will stop feeling love and unity with you."

    This becomes a problem for parents when their children move into adolescence. This can also occur between spouses. In many countries a wife might be suppressed at first, and thus, the husband feels powerful and affirmed. If, however, she begins to think and act for herself, he begins to panic and can become angry and sometimes aggressive. The roles may also be reversed where the woman controls and feels affirmed.

  2. We also feel affirmation when someone needs us or is dependent on us. This could occur between parent and child, teacher and student, friends, or between the "savior" and the "needy."

    In these cases, the "needed" feels affirmed by and perhaps superior to the "needy". This is one aspect of codependency. Some of us find meaning in life because someone needs us or depends on us. If however, the other doesn't want to be the child, the student or the needy one anymore, do we feel the same attraction and love? If not, our love is mixed with our need to be "needed".

    In such a case, we need to give, offer, and sacrifice in order to feel useful, worthy or boost our self-image. If this is the case, then all that we offer in these situations, all our sacrifices, are actually for ourselves and not for the others.

    That does not negate the fact that others may actually need us, or that we also simultaneously have feelings of altruistic love. We are often motivated by two or three motives simultaneously

  3. A third aspect of this attraction for affirmation is the situation in which we "love" those "who affirm our rightness", either verbally by telling us we are right, or simply by belonging to the same social, political, religious or spiritual group and thus embrace a similar belief system.

    "I love you because you agree with me, you are like me, you affirm me". If they change beliefs and convert to another political party, religion, or spiritual group, will we feel the same closeness and "love?" Perhaps yes, perhaps no.

  4. A fourth aspect of this affirmation principle is infatuation - called "Eros" (in Greek "erotas") or "falling in love". In this case there is a mutual (occasionally only one-sided) infatuation on the physical, sexual, emotional and sometimes mental level. This is a special attraction between two persons who excite, bring joy to and stimulate each other positively. This positive stimulation often has to do with the needs for security, pleasure and affirmation.

    This intensity of these feelings seldom lasts more than a few years. The couple then has the possibility of transforming their "Eros" into a steady form of unconditional love, or facing the sadness of conflict and / or separation. Sooner or later, we will come face to face with the other's various negative aspects, and if we cannot love them as they are, the relationship suffers.

    Until we are able to love unconditionally, we will be unhappy, insecure and frequently in conflict with those around us. We will be able to do this only when we have matured sufficiently so as to experience inner security, inner satisfaction, inner freedom and a steady feeling of self-worth.

    In other words, we can love purely only those who we do not need.

    When we need others, we cannot love them unconditionally. This might be difficult to comprehend at first, but deep thought and observation will prove it to be true. Being able to love without conditions is a basic prerequisite for both a happy life and spiritual evolution.




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Friday, June 6, 2008

Love or Need for Security ?

Our Love is Mixed With Need

Our love is still mixed with a considerable amount of need. Love wants to give. Need wants to take. Sometimes what we are seeking to take is very subtle and requires deep inner inquiry.
Whenever we feel pain, fear or anger in our relationships, it is because we believe that our needs are in "danger" of not being satisfied. When this happens, our "love" turns to hurt, disappointment, fear, loneliness, inferiority, or bitterness, and sometimes, anger, hate, rage and desire for revenge.
How can love become all these negative emotions? It cannot. The simple truth is that our emotion never was pure love to begin with. It was an "attraction" based to some degree also on need.
This does not mean that we should reject ourselves because we have seldom really loved purely. As we are not yet enlightened spiritual beings, how could we? It would be like rejecting ourselves because we do not yet have a university diploma when we are still in the first grade or because we are a flower bud, which has not yet blossomed. It is only natural that we cannot yet love unconditionally. This is our stage of evolution.


Freeing our Love from Need

The first step towards opening our hearts to real love is to accept and love ourselves exactly as we are with all our weaknesses and faults. Only then can we proceed effectively.

The second step is to begin observing the feelings that are stimulated in our transpersonal. Through objective self-observation, we can determine in which situations we love unconditionally and in which we are feeling "loving" with specific conditions. Following are some examples that will help.


Needing Those Who Make Us Feel Secure

We look to others for security. We might seek security from our parents, spouses, siblings, children, employers, friends, ministers, spiritual teachers or others.

We do feel love toward these beings, but often that love is based on the fact that they offer us a sense of security. If they start behaving in ways that obstruct our feelings of security or if they decide to leave or ignore us, will we still love them?

If our employer fires us, will we still love him or her? If our parents throw us out onto the street, will we still love them? Or is our love tightly woven with the need for security?

If as parents we dream that our children will become economically well off and socially accepted professionals, will we love them the same if they become street artists, beggars or anarchists? Some parents will be able to; others will not.

The basic question is whether or not our feelings of love are steady and consistent regardless of the various changing behaviors of those we "love". In each case where we perceive our heart closing, we need to discover what we fear in that situation. What might we believe is in danger? Most frequently we lose our love when we fear that our security, self-worth, freedom or pleasure are in danger.

Only when we have realized total inner security, perhaps based on an inner spiritual awakening or on our faith in the Divine, will we be able to love without security attachments.

Only when we know that we can live without others can we really love them steadily. S

ociety has caused us to completely confuse this matter. We believe that if we love others, then we must be totally dependent on them and should fear that our world would fall apart if something happens to them. This is insecurity.

This is a lack of awareness of our inner spiritual nature and our ability to deal with life.

It has nothing to do with love.
"Where there is perfect love, there can be no fear".
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Thursday, June 5, 2008

What is Love ?

Love is our greatest need.
Is it our highest most fulfilling state.

Do we really love or are we simply attached to, identified with or dependent upon the persons we "love"? Is our love free and unconditional, or is it mixed with various needs, conditions and demands? What is unconditional love? Is it possible for us to cultivate it? What is the difference between love and attachment? How can we determine whether what we feel is love or attachment? How can we purify our love and move into a higher level of consciousness? These are some of the many questions that we need to answer in order to create happiness.


Defining Love

Love is a very difficult word to define, perhaps because its reality approaches spiritual dimensions, which are beyond time and space, and thus, our comprehension.

Love is perhaps more easily described by what it is not. Love is not fear, hurt, pain, jealousy, bitterness, hate, separateness, lust, attachment, aggressiveness, ego-centeredness, indifference, possessiveness, suppression - the list goes on.

Love , like God, peace and other spiritual realities, can be perceived more easily through the effects that it creates. We cannot see the wind, but we can see its effects, such as the leaves moving, branches swaying, or the sound of air rushing. We know wind exists by its various side effects. We know there is a Creator because we perceive its effect - creation itself. What then are the effects of love?

Love creates feelings of unity. We feel toward others as we feel towards ourselves. We are as interested in their welfare, happiness, success, health and spiritual growth as much as we are about our own. Loving others means wanting them to be happy in whatever ways they are guided to their happiness. It breeds understanding, compassion, forgiveness, happiness, excitement, peace, joy, fulfillment and a desire to be helpful in any way we can.

Love is expansion beyond our ego limitations. It is the ability to identify with the other, to let go of our self-interest and personal needs enough to really hear and understand the otherÕs needs and interests. It means caring enough to sacrifice, when necessary, our own pleasures and desires when the otherÕs needs are obviously more important. Love is the force that brings about unity and harmony. It is the "glue" of the universe. It helps persons with different egos, desires, programmings and needs to overcome all those potentially repelling forces and unite.

Love needs not so much to be learned or cultivated, but rather released or brought from within us to the surface. We are love. Our basic nature is love. However, our ignorance, fear and attachment have buried it so deeply within us that it is sometimes difficult to summon or maintain. Loving others steadily, independently of their behavior, is not an easy achievement.

Love versus Need

The power of attraction which we call love is expressed on many levels and in countless ways.
The most basic level is that of need. We often use the word love when we really mean, "need".

We say, "I love you." But, if we analyze ourselves deeply, we will realize learn we really mean, "I need you." This is the basic message of most love songs. They lament with sadness, pain, agony and cry out "you left me, I cannot live without you. I need you."

This is not the highest form of love. It is love mixed with need, attachment and addiction. If it were pure love and the other was happier by leaving us or even happier with someone else, we would be happy for him or her, not full of sadness for ourselves. Loving others means wanting them to be happy, healthy and successful in the ways that they are guided to be.

Love does not create the pain we feel when someone leaves us or rejects us. That pain is generated by our dependency upon that person for our security, pleasure or affirmation.

Needs and attachments create fear, pain and suffering.
Love creates happiness, fulfillment and the experience of our True Selves.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Dealing With Criticism and Difference in Opinion

Why this is important
We often become emotionally disturbed during a disagreement, or an argument, or when someone criticizes us or disagrees with us. In such cases our personality usually feels hurt, demeaned and in danger. When we feel this way, we destroy our own happiness, clarity and health and often behave in ways which we later regret.

A simple technique for gaining clarity is to:
  1. Remember that concerning criticism, there are two possibilities:
    The other person might be correct in his or her observations and criticism. In this case we would benefit by admitting it and making the proper adjustment in our behavior. We have everything to gain by listening and evolving through othersÕ comments. What prevents us is the belief that we are not lovable if we are not perfect. Thus, we do not want to see or admit our faults. When we realize that we are worthy of love and respect even when we are not perfect or right, then we will be able to look at our faults.
    The other person might be wrong. In this case, it is his or her projection, and we need not be affected by these misconceptions or projections. We have in this case the lesson of loving ourselves and also the others even when they perceive us in distorted and negative ways.

  2. One solution would be simply not to react one way or the other at first, but to reflect upon what has been said for some time so as to evaluate whether or not it is true. We can establish a space in our minds where we can store such questions about our personality structure or actions so as to observe objectively for ourselves if they are true. If they are not, then we simply continue on in the way we were. We need not feel hurt, angry, defend ourselves, prove ourselves, or attack. When we feel inner security and self-worth, we do not need to react in these ways.

  3. We can simply thank the other for this feedback and tell him or her that we will think about this observation and will gradually come to our conclusions, and if necessary, make changes. We do not need to live our lives in accordance with othersÕ perceptions. We can listen to all, but follow ourselves.

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Sunday, June 1, 2008

MOTIVATION and POSITIVE THINKING

Create Happiness with a Positive Life Outlook

The mind is the molder of our personal and communal world

Every event we perceive through our senses is analyzed, evaluated and registered in the mind as pleasant, unpleasant or neutral। Our belief systems seek to determine whether each perceived input is something, which will "protect" or "endanger" our security, self-worth and / or freedom. When life’s events are interpreted by our programmed mind as threatening, fearful or unpleasant, we experience a state of anxiety and tension. When anxiety and nervous tension become a chronic situation, then the body and mind are gradually worn down into a state of weakness and ill health. A psychosomatic illness is created. The energy flow, concentration and clarity of the mind are disturbed. Organs begin to malfunction. Negative emotional states such as depression, bitterness, fear, anger, hate, envy, jealousy and resentment dominate the mind. Our relationships begin to deteriorate and a feeling of alienation can set it. It is time for Attitude Therapy.
Attitude Therapy
In Attitude Therapy we transform attitudes, beliefs or perceptions, which prevent us from experiencing health, happiness and harmony। Negative, life-destroying attitudes are replaced by positive life-building ones. Let us consider some of these beneficial attitudes.
1) I Alone Am Responsible for My Life, Health and Happiness
We create our health, illness, happiness, unhappiness, unity, alienation, joys and problems through our ways of thinking, behaving, eating, sleeping, living and interacting। When we eat poorly, do not exercise, sleep too little or too much, do not breathe properly and waste our mental and emotional energy on so many superficial pursuits, we will naturally lose our health and peace of mind.

We create our reality in four basic ways।
  1. Our choices, thoughts, actions and reactions of the past create corresponding results in our present life and psychosomatic state। (If in fact there is such a reality as reincarnation, then our past will also include all our choices of past lives.) Thus, a considerable amount of our present reality is dictated by our previous actions, choices and reactions.
  2. We have chosen (as souls) to learn certain "lessons" at each stage of our evolutionary process।
  3. a) If we have chosen to learn to learn self-acceptance it is natural to experience rejection from others so that we an develop inner self-worth।
  4. b)If we have chosen to develop self-confidence, we will naturally have chosen to experience an absence of external support।
  5. c) If we have chosen to learn forgiveness and unconditional love, we will have made a secret "soul agreement" with others to harm us so that we can then develop that type of forgiveness and love।
  6. Our present conscious and subconscious beliefs are perhaps the greatest cause of our preset reality। We attract to ourselves behaviors, events and life situations, which in some way "mirror" or "vibrate sympathetically" with how we think and feel in the present. Our present positive and negative conscious and subconscious beliefs, desires, needs, expectations and emotions such as fear, guilt, shame, love, peace and anger all combine to attract to us a corresponding external (and certainly internal) reality.
  7. In addition to attracting certain realities, we also interpret what is happening according to our beliefs। We give greater or lesser importance to specific issues and thus allow them to affect our state of mind to a greater or lesser degree. When we give great importance to our appearance or to how others perceive us or behave towards us, then our reality will change greatly every time we receive an input concerning our appearance or what others think.
Of these four factors we have control over only the last two at this point in time। We cannot change our past choices and our soul lessons are an integral part of our presence in these bodies. Thus we are left with changing our present conscious and subconscious beliefs. Firstly this will allow us to attract more positive behaviors, events and situations toward our being. Secondly, we will perceive life more positively so that even when we are not getting our preferred reality we feel secure, worthy and free to be our selves. This is our point of power.Changing what we believe about life, others and most important of all, ourselves. Some of those alternative ways of perceiving life will be described in this series.

Some of them are:
  1. I Alone Am Responsible for My Life, Health and Happiness
  2. We have the inner power and resourcefulness to deal with whatever life brings us।
  3. Our self-worth is a function on our inner being and has nothing to do with appearance, affluence, position, knowledge or what others think।
  4. Life gives us exactly what we need to create happiness and to continue our evolutionary process।
  5. We are free to live our lives according to our own inner ideals and goals and to change our reality if we chose to।
  6. We deeply love and seek to help our loved ones, while simultaneously remembering they are souls in the process of evolution who have chosen heir specific lessons।
  7. We are all We are all eternal souls in the evolutionary process of rediscovering and manifesting our inner divine nature।
  8. Each being is divine creation and deserves our love and respect including us।
  9. Our life purpose is to individually and collectively transform our reality into a more enlightened and loving one।
  10. Our basic lesson is Love
  11. All of this universe is an expression of the one Universal Omnipresent and Omnipotent Being - Consciousness।
  12. We as co-creators with the Divine have been created to bless, spiritualize and transform the material world।

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